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Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Don't....Just Don't
I was just watching an episode of one of those "clean your obscenely dirty, messy, piggy house that was probably staged for ratings but it's so grossly fascinating that I can't bear to tear my eyes away from the screen, not for one second, because I might miss the mother of all messes" shows that I LOVE to watch because it makes me feel like I'm the neatest, cleanest, most organized woman alive.

I'm glad I didn't look away because the husband (aka Messy Man) had about 30, yes 30 stuffed animals sitting on the master bed headboard.

Yucky. Gross. Blech.

I'm sorry, but adults are not supposed to keep stuffed animals on or near the bed. That's just not right.

When the Organization Nazi asked Messy Man if he was willing to give them up, he said something to the effect of, "These little guys have been with me a long time." Then he grimaced.

The Organization Nazi said, "Yes, but isn't it time to grow up?"

Then Messy Man said it.
He just HAD to go there.
He said,"But I'm a kid at heart?"

I don't know what it is about men saying they're "kids at heart", but it BUGS THE EVERLIVING SHIT outta me. I'm guessing it has to do with the fact that I don't want to have relations with or be married to a kid? Or someone who thinks of themself as a kid? Especially a kid that owns 30 assorted stuffed animals that hover over me all night. Be a man, a big rugged man who doesn't cuddle with Tweety Bird or Beany Babies or the Tazmanian Devil.

I mean, come on, who wants that?


Blogger Lisa said...

I usually feel like a total unorganized slacker. But after I watch those shows I think, "I'm not so bad afterall." I always feel so much better. I'm usually waiting for them to find some giant dead rat or something in the midst of the mess. (I don't have cable but when I go to my MIL's we watch tv all day. So I catch about five episodes in that time.)

But thank you! Yes. Guys that say they are "kids at heart" mean they don't plan to get their heads out of their butts anytime soon. And that is the last kind of person I want to work with or live with.

Oh and on the hair thing. It really IS that bad! (Sigh and sniffle.)

Blogger Kami said...

Wow. What a weirdo!!

Blogger TBG said...

amen sister!

Blogger Lori said...

Oh, no, no, no! I do actually have a stuffed lamb on a shelf in our bedroom, but it's from when I was a kid. No stuffed stuff on the bed!

Blogger Nap Queen said...

Lori---That is fine!! This guy had a full-on kid's collection hovering over the bed. He even mentioned that they fall on his wife sometimes!

Blogger Spikey1 said...

I'm going to say it... I'm a kid at heart!

ooh! Maybe he is one of those stuffed animal fetish people! *shudder*

Anonymous Mabel said...

I swear that men will do anything in their power to keep from growing up. With the exception of the ones that forget what it's like to be a kid...

Blogger Carrie said...

I could get that he may want to hold onto them because they're tied to memories, but not on the bed. Maybe on a shelf in a study or a box in the closet.... :)

Blogger pack of 2 said...

uh...i'm not really sure what to say about him...i don't get stuffed animal collections in the first place though...men or women's.


Blogger JD's Rose said...

Sad yet cute!

Blogger suburban mom said...

OMG - I totally agree!!! I think it is so wierd when grown people still are in love with toys (kid toys that is :)

Blogger Tammy said...

Amen, sister.

I also hate it when grown people put stuffed animals in the back windows of their vehicles. Come on people. Stop it.

Blogger Elisette said...

I love that my son's room is adorned with my husband's favorite stuffed toy from his childhood (which is a truck) but if that thing were in MY bedroom? He'd be driving it right back to his mom's house.

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